In Case You Missed It: Loretta Sieman — 'Bad Catholic' and Charitable Icon — Honored After Dowling Flap

To be clear, it wasn’t entirely accurate to call the fundraiser and roast honoring Loretta Sieman, “A Tribute to the Woman Who Can’t Say No.”

West Des Moines’ Sieman did say “no” last fall, with authority. Not loudly, but firmly. Graciously even, given that she felt her religion – her core – had just been slighted.

She told officials at — and the Most Rev. Richard E. Bishop Pates, bishop of the Des Moines Diocese — thanks, but no.

Here's what happened: After a public announcement that Sieman would be honored as an outsanding alumnus, Dowling President Jerry Deegan called her to the school to talk about a flurry of emails, many of them anonymous, criticizing her advocacy of Planned Parenthood as a health-care resource for uninsured women.

Dowling didn't rescind the award. But Sieman decided that if people were going to whisper behind her back that she was a bad Catholic because of two years’ board service to Planned Parenthood of Greater Iowa, she probably wasn’t the right recipient for the award. In her 69 years she has helped people without question, and she wasn't about to start questioning herself.

Mixing Politics, Religion Taints Both

The whispers and the meeting with Dowling's president hurt. Sieman won’t deny that.

“It made me feel like they were questioning my right to help people and who I should help,” she said. “Am I supposed to interview them first?”

The flap has changed how Sieman regards her church — she’s not as faithful about attending Mass as she was eight months ago — but nothing has changed about her call to serve.

She will still, as Catholics are charged to do, serve where she’s needed. And she’ll defend others’ right to serve as they feel appropriate, free of critical judgment.

“Most frightening to me is how judgmental we have become, that we believe we have the right to tell people how to live their lives,” Sieman said. “I am in charge of my life, but I am not in charge of yours.”

When politics and religion mix, she said, it bastardizes both.

“I will take care of my body, I will take care of my religion,” she said she tells politicians when they ask for her support. “You take care of health care, education and the economy, and we will be stronger.”

"Citizen of the Century"

In the eight months since the tempest, Sieman’s friends have been fuming about the slight to a woman who folks say has done more good things for more good causes than anyone can reliably count. If the Dowling alumni award was out of her reach, the community needed to make up for the affront, they decided.

“It seemed to me that was unjust and unwise and very hurtful to Loretta, and the community should come together and give her our citizen of the year award, or citizen of the decade, or the century,” said trial attorney and Democratic Party activist Roxanne Conlin. “Look at any charitable cause, look at any community activity, and some place along the way, you will find Loretta.”

Conlin, a former U.S. Senate and gubernatorial candidate and one of Iowa’s top activists for women’s rights, rallied Sieman’s defenders.

“It’s amazing that she had the gumption to say, ‘You know what, I don’t think I should take this award',” said Marcia Wanamaker, a West Des Moines Realtor who has served with Sieman on dozens of boards and fundraising committees.

Wanamaker, a Catholic herself, understands what it took for Sieman to stand up to church hierarchy. Catholicism teaches followers of Christ not to forget the poor and to “help people in general,” Wanamaker said. “That’s Loretta’s whole mantra.

“Women who need birth control are not needy?” Wanamaker mocked. “Of course they are. With Loretta and most of us, it’s not about abortions, it’s not even about Planned Parenthood. It’s about helping people."

Sieman was content to let it be until the four women — Conlin, Wanamaker, commercial Realtor Pat Schneider and community activist Michelle Griswell — convinced her to consent to the “roast and toast” tribute.

Sieman almost said no to that, too. Her catch was that proceeds from the $100-a-plate dinner go to charities she could handpick. The $25,000 raised will likely be split among groups serving the mentally ill and children and families in need.

You’re A Goner When ...

That Sieman casts a wide net with her charitable work was a recurring theme Tuesday as about 150 of the metro area’s power elite turned out to honor her.

“No matter who you are, if Loretta has you in her sights, she is impossible to shake,”  President Gerry Neugent said, joking that his company installed an "LED" – a Loretta Escape Door – for use when she approached them to contribute to her charity of the day.

Once, he said, she opened with: “Sweetie, I’ve got you down for $5,000.”

“No matter who you are, Loretta has you in a future budget," he said. "Once Loretta calls you ‘Sweetie,’ you are a goner.”

Griswell, one of the tribute organizers, said though remarkable, there’s nothing magical behind Sieman’s charitable omnipresence.

“It’s because she cares about people," Griswell said. "Even when West Des Moines was expanding exponentially, she never let us forget our community is about people.”

In accepting “The Loretta,” a funky statue designed by West Des Moines sculptor Peri Woltjer in her studio, Sieman reminded guests that she has their names and their telephone numbers.

No one ran for cover.

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What Other Community Leaders Had to Say

Behind the gentle jabs of a roast were genuine affection and sincere appreciation. 

“You were always our heart and our soul and our social conscience,” said Gene Meyer, who worked closely with Sieman when she was a ward representative on the West Des Moines  and he was mayor.

Des Moines Register columnist Rekha Basu, who said her piece on the Dowling dustup last fall generated more letters than anything she’s written in recent memory, saluted Sieman for “calling attention to the incivility of our society and the insularity of our churches.”

“Change happens when someone is willing to speak up and go against a pack,” Basu said. “You can be a faithful member of a church and still grant women the right to control their own reproduction.”

Marketing guru Drew McLellan credited Sieman with infectious energy that inspires others. "You gave me the gift to be the very best of myself," he said. "That, my friend, is your voodoo. That is why every time you call, I will be ready to join in the adventure, and bring the best of myself to whatever cause you are fighting."